Here’s a conversation I had with my twenty-one year old Senior in college, about how, as soon as he got a job, now or very soon, he could start paying me back the money I put out for him this past year.
Lets back up to the begining of his Junior year. I told him that he needed to get a job. Seriously!
He is a Senior now; still no job and will soon be cut off if no job is had.
I said, “You get a job and I will still help you. If you don’t, then I don’t care if you graduate from college or not. If you don’t care enough about a job to help pay your way then I don’t care enough to pay your way. You give a shit and I will give a shit. Seriously!
He said to me. “When I was growing up you never told me I would someday have to (You pick the last part of this sentence, it is all the same)–pay my own way—support myself—be cut off from your money.. Seriously!?!
Now in all seriousness, my son was joking. But behind the joke was the truth. When he was growing up, I think I did forget to say those very words to him.
We teach our children all sorts of important things to help them grow up, but a really good thing to say to your child, actually many times over, would be these very words:
“Juma, someday you will have to support yourself.”
A bit too vague. Too much room for the imagination.
“Juma, someday when you get older, you will have to support yourself.”
Still a bit loose. Be a bit more visual.
“Juma, someday when you are 16 years old you will have to do something to earn some money. Then when you are 18 you will need to be a bit more serious and earn all of your money for anything that is not food, a roof over your head, health and school related. Then when you are 21 you will have to pay for your roof over your head, food and everything else except school and your health. Then when you graduate you will have to pay for everything that you require in life.
I think that covers things.